From Brett and Briita

Papa O'Neil

I wish I would have had the courage to stand up at Papas memorial. If I would have, this is what I would have said;

I am so grateful to have had 'Papa O'Neil' in my life. He wasn't my real grandpa, I was blessed to have him come with the wonderful family I married into. But you would have never been able to tell I was an 'in-law', he hugged , kissed, and told me he loved me right on down the line with his real grandchildren. He showed me what a real papa is like, and we are all so lucky to have had him in our lives.

His face beamed with pride when he spoke of each grandchild, no matter if it was his grown ones with children of their own or the little ones just starting school. He was proud of every single one for being who they are. I honestly don't think any one of us were left with a doubt in our minds that he loved us and was proud. His family was everything to him.

I am so grateful my son, Collin, got to know his great grandpa, he has been asking lately who hi will pick blueberries with now. He was papa's little buddy, and he tells me now "Papa Omeil :) was a very very good papa, huh mom?' I am deeply saddened that my daughter, Katherine, was just too young when he passed. She never had her special time to be papa's buddy. But his legacy will live on and every grandchild now and those to come, they will feel as thought they knew him because we will never stop talking of him, sharing his stories, or using his witty little quotes.

My husband, Brett, was heartbroken when he received the phone call of papa's passing. He told me later he wished he would have told papa how he truly felt about him. He was always just too embarrassed. He thought of papa as a dad to him. Big Jerry was his father figure, his role model, and the one man that was the stable rock in his life. I know there won't be a day that passes that Brett's heart won't ache for his grandpa. But papa knew how Brett felt because I had told his mother and everyone in our family knows when a nice tidbit like that is shared:)

One last thing, people have always called Brett and I 'mini Jerry and Karen' because we always bicker! I guess that would be a good word, or 'push each others buttons' and we're great at it like they always were. And what I say to that now is, 'If having a partner who loves me and stands by my side for over 40 years building a beautiful family full of love and watching each of them grow into their own families and being loved by so many people comes with that title, then call us that' because I feel HONERED to have that comparison.

We all love and miss you Papa O'Neil!
XXOO Briita

KAREN’S FIRST OUTING…..

Other than another trip to the hospital or doctors appointment….Megan and I took mom to watch Makayla play four games of volley ball. You will all be happy to know she was cheering, coaching, smiling and laughing from the side line….just back to her old self…..which was so wonderful to see. The wound on her chest is 95% healed and she will see the traveling nurse today in which we hope she will be discharged.

On May 27th mom will go back to Harborview and see Dr. Trout that did her pelvic surgery. We are all hoping he will let her start putting some weight on her left leg.

Aunt Pam (moms 2nd to youngest sister who is also a nurse) is here from New York helping with mom’s care and being a great supporter for the rest of us…..thank you Aunt Pam!

WE LOVE YOU MOM! ~ Mindy

MY AMAZING DAD

MY AMAZING DAD

Some of the things that made my dad special may have been small to some, but as I look back they are so huge to me. He was such a patient man and he took the quality time necessary to give us what we needed.

I can remember lying on the couch with him about 3 years old, all dressed up in mom’s negligee both of us ‘reading’ a book. I have a photo of that moment and it is one I have cherished through the years. Another one I like to look at often, is of me at about that same age, dad is holding me up on his knee as I cry with another of many skinned knees.

When I got a few years older and dad was mowing lawns on his days between shifts at the fire station, he would take me along to chat with his elderly customers. They all had some kind of treat like Popsicles, ice-cream, and candy. I was happy with that but as an adult I realize he truly cared and was proud to have me along.

As kids I remember going out to the base to visit dad while he was on shift. Each and every time he would meet us out front with that cherub smile, strut us around proudly so everyone knew we there. Then we would beg to ‘spray the water’ which was driving us out on the tarmac in the biggest fire truck there and shoot that water, sound the sirens and lights while we giggled jumping up and down.

When I got older he took me along to the Roy Rodeo to watch his fire fighting team compete in the ‘cow milking’ contest. I think they only one once, but it was so exciting to stand at the fence and tell others around me that ‘that’s my dad out there.’

Through the years I have been giving dad a hard time about an incident at the Puyallup Fair when I was 15. My friend, Jamie, and I drank some beer in the parking lot and got caught by police officers. When our parents were called, our options were to pay $15 fine and that would be that. But dad wanted to teach me a lesson, wouldn’t pay the fine, and I was sent to Raymond Hall. I cried through the whole thing and the judge took one look at me and said ‘she doesn’t belong here’ It was probably the best learning experience in my entire youth. I thank dad for being a ‘hard ass’ and I love him that much more for truly caring, and I am so glad he knew how I truly feel.

Another very fond memory I will treasure is summers at Flaming Geyser Park. If you don’t know the area, you drive a few miles up through the park and float down the river on entertubes. Then you have to hike on the hot asphalt all the way back to your rig. My dad would drop us at the top, drive down to the bottom, pull out a book and wait for us to float down. I look back now and think about all the sacrifices he’s made through the years to make our lives special.

Mom has always said ‘any man can be a father, but it takes a very special man to be a dad’. ‘Big Jer’ is a perfect example of that. I will treasure each and every moment and memory I have with my dad. I don’t know why God took him from us but, I do know that dad would want us to take care of mom, be strong and lean on each other, and not dwell on the fact that he is gone, but remember all the wonderful things we shared as a family.

I am comforted to know that he has left this earth with so very many people who cared and loved him, and he will be in my heart always and forever. I love you dad and mom.

Your grateful daughter,

Mindy

My Dad Was a Hero

My dad was a hero. He was a hero in a conventional way. He spent his career as a distinguished fire fighter helping others. I always new he had a lot of friends, but it wasn’t until he died that I came to understand the number of people who’s life he had influenced.

I am amazed by all of the notes that our family has received, talking about what a real friend he was, or the way he mentored a young fire fighter with a gentle hand and a solid butt chewing. Much like he parented me. I always thought my dad was a hero, and it had nothing to do with what he did at work every day. It had to do with the way he parented all of us kids, his children, and every other young person who passed thru our front door.

We all new that he loved us unconditionally, whether we had wrecked the car we weren’t supposed to be driving, or lied about being someplace we weren’t supposed to be. He ALWAYS loved us. We knew that. We knew that by the way he was there every time we needed to talk. We knew it by the way he would make 50 little pancakes instead of 5 big ones because to our 6 year old selves they always tasted better when they were smaller. We knew it by the way he allowed us to fail, but was always there to lift us up, with a wise word and a hug.

My dad was a hero. I am so glad to know that I am not the only one who knew.

- Megan

Celebrating the Life of Jerome T. O'Neil, Sr.

On Saturday, April 19, many gathered to fill the room at Powers Funeral Home in Puyallup, Washington to celebrate the life of Jerry O'Neil. The service was no doubt how Jerry would have wanted it--surrounded by his family and friends sharing stories and memories of a man adored by so many.

During the memorial, a slide show was played featuring Jerry with his family over the years. To read his biography and view the movie, please click here.

Hollis Monaghan said a few words about Jerry and his last statement resonated within all of us: "If you measure a man's worth by the friends he has, or by the people that loved him, then Jerry O'Neil is one of the richest people I know."

From Dennis& Lynda Graves

Karen

I was so shocked to learn of Jerrys & your accident.I had just talked to him about 5-6 weeks ago ,he had told me you usually went home to Washington about the first of April,you must have gone early.I had stated I would love to visit this summer.

Jerry was as close to me as the Brother I never had. I will never forget the good times we had the 2 years at Phalsburg A.F.B France. We were best friends-roommates for two years,rode the same truck,ate every meal together went to town together,partners in the card games & all the people on the base thought we were brothers.

I remember him telling me he had 5 sisters &they whipped his ass until he was in high school.One sister wrote him a letter and enclosed a stamped -self addressed envelope with a blank piece of paper& pen.

He talked about his motorcycle escapades before he joined the A.F and how he bought a house on the lake in Idaho when he retired& about froze to death cause he said he had forgotten how damm cold it was in Montana& Idaho.

I regret I did'nt get to visit there but one time,but was happy he got to come here twice.Jerry was always happy even when you were after him & he called you the mad czech .

I wish we had lived closer so i could have visited often.I will never forget the great times we had together and some of the crazy things we did. I will miss Jerry ,I loved him like a brother .

Please feel free for you or the children to visit us in Knoxville, you are forever welcome.

I hate I will miss the celebration of Jerrys life,I had to attend our granddaughter's wedding in Orlando.

I will call you when I am better able to talk. Wishing you a speedy& complete recovery.

Dennis& Lynda Graves

(tweaser)

From The Burdines

It was 1985 when Janet and I first met Jerry and Karen – it was an instant like and a friendship that has grown.

My numerous conversations with Jerry, usually a lot about nothing but always enjoyable, will be greatly missed. As will he.

Karen, your love for Jerry and your strong will to persevere will see you through this tough time in your life – get well soon.

Please accept our deepest condolences.

Love always,

The Burdines (Alison)

It was instant friendship when we first met Jerry and Karen in 1985. Numerous conversations with Jerry, mainly about golf and politics will be missed. Sunsets in Utah , Fish and Chips and Guinness at the Spar -- memories we will cherish forever!
Karen, our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family at this time.

Sincerely,

The Burdine Family (William)

From Tom and Rose Little

Karen and Family,

We are so sorry to hear of Jerry's passing, our family sends our condolences. I will always remember the times that Jerry would let some of us younger boys ride his Indian motorcycle, it was all we could do to even hold it up, but once we got it going we thought we were really cool! He was a great friend and will be truly missed. Thanks for keeping us informed with the blog, you have a wonderful family. Karen get well soon.

Tom and Rose Little
Pittsburg, Missouri.

Memorial Service - April 19, 2008

In Memoriam A.H.H. XXXVIII

With weary steps I loiter on.
Tho' always under alter'd skies
The purple from the distance dies,
My prospect and horizon gone.

No joy the blowing season gives,
The herald melodies of spring,
But in the songs I love to sing
A doubtful gleam of solace lives.

If any care for what is here
Survive in spirits render'd free,
Then are these songs I sing of thee
Not all ungrateful to thine ear.

-- Alfred Lord Tennyson

---

A memorial service will be held on Saturday, April 19, 2008 at 10:00AM at the Powers Funeral Home to honor Jerry O'Neil. Jerry passed away March 29, 2008 in a car accident. We are extending an invitation to join the family and friends at the memorial service. Due to Karen's efforts to recover from the accident, the family will not be hosting a public reception.

Powers Funeral Home
320 W. Pioneer Avenue
Puyallup, WA 98371


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From Bob and Nancy Martin

We have been neighbors of the O'Neil's for almost seven years. Jerry and Bob immediately connected by sharing their knowledge of history, past experiences, and their attempt to solve the world's problems. Jerry was always ready to share lawn mowing duties and would assist with any task or request in our park. Whenever I was in the yard working, Jerry would compliment me on our flowers and plants. He was the consummate gentleman! Even our dog, Libby, was quick to run to Jerry when outside to receive gentle pats on the head and good scratches behind the ears. Jerry will be greatly missed! Karen, we grieve with you and your family. But we give thanks for the progress you are making in your recovery. I am waiting for your return to share books and recipes.

Bob and Nancy Martin

From Dan Vogel

Of my 31 years in the USAF, I spent a total of 9 years over 3 tours at McChord with 6 years under Jerry--first as my Asst Chief and later as my Fire Chief. Jerry was the first USAF civilian I worked for that treated military and civilian fire fighters equally and fairly.

Jerry let me grow as a young NCO but brought the hammer down hard as I left to go overseas. His low-key asskicking was a turning point in my career. He
welcomed me back, gave me a second chance and made me the department training chief. He once told me if anyone could make Chief Master Sergeant in his department, it was me--which I eventually did under Fire Chief Larry Replogle.
Coincidentally, Jerry's grandson later worked for me when I was Fire Chief at Misawa AB, Japan.

Jerry had few rules but I remember three, 1) KNOW your job so during an emergency you can DO your job, 2) Don't touch anything in the fridge that isn't yours, and 3) If the Seahawks or Huskies are on TV, don't get anywhere near the remote.

He was a fine man, a great boss, and a true leader.

Dan Vogel, CMSgt Ret.

Deputy Program Director
Fire & Emergency Services
Commander, Navy Region Southeast
PO Box 102
Bldg 919 Langley Street
Naval Air Station
Jacksonville, FL 32212-0102

From Steve and Jane Christensen

I got the news about Jerry today...ruined my whole day. Great man, good friend and my first mentor. I left McChord and went to Eugene where I had a 26 year career as a Firefighter/paramedic. I never had another captain that helped me to the extent that Jerry did. And I will be forever grateful to the group at McChord for helping me be prepared for my career in the fireservice. But especially Jerry. Karen, what can I say. I am so sorry. I pray you have a speedy recovery. This blog is a great thing .I'm writing at 12:30 at night and I got up from bed cuz I couldn't sleep and I needed to post this.

Love,
Steve and Jane Christensen
McChord 1972 to 1974

From Bud and Sylvia

THE WORLD, AND THE O'NEILL FAMILY HAVE LOST A TRUE GENTLEMAN AND A WONDERFUL MAN. OUR THOUGHTS GO OUT TO ALL OF YOU. AT SUCH A DIFFICULT TIME, WE CANNOT THANK ALL OF YOU ENOUGH, FOR SHARING WITH ALL OF US ON THE BLOG. IT HAS BEEN SUCH A WONDERFUL SOURCE OF INFORMATION.

SUNDANCE RV PARK WILL NEVER BE THE SAME WITH THE LOSS OF JERRY. WE WILL ALWAYS MISS HIS SPECIAL SMILE WHEN WE LOOK ACROSS THE STREET.

WE WILL KEEP CLAPPING OUR HANDS, TRYING TO KEEP THOSE BIRDS OUT OF THE TREE, JERRY!!!!!!!

WE HOPE YOU ARE WELL SOON, KAREN. YOU ARE SO LUCKY TO HAVE SUCH A WONDERFUL FAMILY.........AND THEY TO HAVE YOU. OUR THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU . WE ARE SO SORRY FOR YOUR LOSS.

BUD & SYLVIA CLARK.......NEIGHBOURS IN YUMA

From Lisa

Aunt Karen:

I am so glad to see that you are well enough to go home. I have written several notes and then deleted them because there just doesn't seem to be words to express my feelings. Even though you and Uncle Jerry lived so far away from us, I have such wonderful memories of Uncle Jerry. I am so glad that Kevin was able to meet Uncle Jerry this past summer at the farm because his personality reminds me so much of him. But I guess the men that are with Matejka women need to have that laid back, fun loving, quiet but jesting personality to tolerate us!!! Uncle Jerry will always hold a special place in my heart..... and don't worry, I will keep his "fight" for water on the farm going strong!!! I know that you will receive the best care from Susan, Mindy, Jerome, and Megan and you will be up and around in no time. My thoughts are with you and I will see you in August when we come to Washington.

Love,
Lisa

From Gary and Dar II

Karen:

We are so happy to see your smiling face. We know it is because of the wonderful care you are getting from your family. Our thoughts have been with you each day even though we are miles away. We have kept up to date on your progress with the postings on the blog. And, we are overwhelmed, as you must be, by the outpouring of love and support. Jerry was a great friend and father as the messages have so eloquently stated. We have shared many good times with you both and the family. Our hearts go out to you all.

See you soon.
Gary and Dar

An Update From Megan

Mom is doing great. We will have an in-home care nurse come tommorow to evaluate mom's needs. She will be having Physical & Occupational Therapy. We practiced transfering her from the bed to the wheelchair, toilet etc. We got an A+ from the hospital therapist before we left.

Mom was able to come home by car. She was a bit uncomfortable, but handled it like a champ. She is just glad to be home, and is grateful to everyone for their thoughts and prayers. The outpouring of support for our family has been amazing.

We all agree that it is what is keeping us strong.

From Mandy Crawford

Dear Karen,

My name is Mandy. I met you and your husband at the farm back in Elmira. I am a friend of your sister Teak and Niece Casie. I wanted to send out my condolences to you and your family for your loss. I spoke with Teak this evening and she told me what happened and I will e keeping you and your family in my prayers. I hope that you recover quickly and from what I have read your a very strong person. Take care and get better soon.

Mandy Crawford
Albany NY

A Heartfelt Thank You

We always knew our mom and dad were very special people. The amount of love and prayer that this family has received the past 10 days has been a godsend. Our mom will be coming home tomorrow. Although she is still not 100% we feel she is ready to come home and get some much needed sleep. With the help of so many family and friends, she will be up and going in no time.

To all those who have been there for this family words are not enough. You have helped us in so many ways. From picking me up at the airport, thanks Ed and Carol. For making sure we have clean clothes and something to eat, thanks Ju Ju and Jen. To Ann and Jim for doing all the running and organizing we thank you. Uncle Jim and Aunt Beth, thanks for being here for us and especially for Mom. To Lita, you are amazing.

A very special thanks to Hollis. You were with is us from the first hour. You kept us going and kept us strong. For that you will always be in our hearts and I know why our father loved you so much. Gena, thanks for sharing your husband with us when we needed him. To all our friends and family, you can’t possibly know how much each and everyone of you have helped us. Thank you does not seem like enough, but please know that we are eternally grateful to each and everyone of you. We are truly blessed with the best.

Susan

Karen Is Home

Amie just sent a picture of Karen at "St. Madsen" (Megan and Jeff's house). Jeff quickly whipped up a shower in their laundry room and as Megan put it, he did an excellent job "Jerry-rigging" the job...Jerry would have been proud!

Good to have Karen out of the hospital and in the care of her wonderful family and friends.

From Dusty, Michele, Page and Ronda

Karen, Susan, Mindy, Little Jerry (sorry, Jerome) and Megan,

We were saddened to hear the news about Jerry. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all!

Dusty, Michele, Page and Ronda

From Kathi Jenkins

If not for Jerry (and a little help from a strategically placed light) I’d have never spent hours on a paint bucket in a dark room drinking Lord only knows what, sharing life stories with Meg while our husbands sat for hours fetching Krispy Kreme doughnuts we no longer wanted when they returned.

Makayla and Marcus were small and Megan and I far too stuck up to introduce ourselves while our children peered across the street at each other. Jerry took the lead and Marcus and Makayla became fast friends. He was our first contact; the rest you can say is history.

The countless stories, the warmth and love from a man lost far too soon. My thoughts and prayers are with the family – my second family. I will miss him and I’m here for all of you – whatever the time, whatever the reason.

I wrote a message for another man lost too soon just shy of a year ago and today while sitting at my desk thinking of what’s yet to come and what has past, I opened it for the first time since reading it at his service and I thought much of this applies in a different way.

The message I wrote was about talking to an angel. At any moment someone can say something and suddenly I’m singing some crazy tune. That day all I could think of was the song “How Do You Talk to An Angel”.

There really is no answer to that question. We all have our own beliefs and thoughts but I can honestly say this, I’ve had the privilege several times of speaking to angel’s right here, on earth, living among us. I’m unsure why we’re so blessed to live among these people but I can say without reservation that Jerry was – is, one of those special angels on earth.

Jerry had a heart so full of love it poured out and touched everyone who surrounded him. He listened and unlike most of us he actually heard what you were saying. Like others before him he placed his time on hold to listen, to assist and to love you through whatever you needed him for.

Just look at this blog, and see to the outpour of love and support. We know he touched us all in so many different ways, ways special to each and every one of us. The void may be vast but the memories, the stories; the love will last all of our lifetimes and will touch the lives of those yet to come.

Someday we will meet Jerry again. We’ll see that sparkle that I’m sure only angels like him have. We’ll hear those strong opinions that have made us chuckle time and time again. The same opinions that have molded many of the lives Jerry touched.

I, like all the others will miss Jerry but as I said in that message not so long ago, I’m comforted to know he is in a place much more deserving of an angel. Waiting with open arms to greet us when we arrive.

From Bret & Brenda Stohr and Family

Our thoughts and prayers are with Karen and the O'Neil family during this time and we wish Karen the speediest of recoveries. We will miss Jerry very much. Our first association with Jerry was in May of 1986, I was working at McConnell AFB in Kansas and being from Washington, I wanted to come home very badly. A job opened at McChord, and of course, I applied. One day the phone rang and it was Jerry, he told me that I would have to be at McChord to apply for the job in person, and went on to tell me "I can't tell you if I am going to hire you or not, but if I were you, I'd consider taking two weeks leave, moving all my stuff to Washington, so I could be here to apply for the job when it opens". So essentially on Jerry's word and faith alone, my wife and I packed up all our stuff and moved back to Washington.

After the job selection was over, Jerry told me, in classic Jerry O'Neil style, that the reason he hired me was because he knew my former boss (at McConnell) from being stationed with him overseas, he told me "that guys is a total ass and if he had anything good to say about anyone, you had to be ok"!! Jerry was a great Fire Chief and an even better mentor. I very much appreciate all the things that he taught me about the craft of firefighting. He will always occupy a place in our lives and in my heart reserved for those wonderful people who had the most impact in our/my life.

Best Wishes To All.

Bret Stohr
Assistant Fire Chief
McChord AFB Fire & Emergency Services

From Cary & Wendy

We first became involved with the O'Neil family in 1975/76 when we became neighbors on Paramount Lane in Enumclaw. And such wonderful times we have shared! Through many different homes and times! If you want stories and pictures, we have them! Jerry, wow, are we going to miss you! Karen, we are here for you! Susan, Mindy, Megan, Jerry,(and all the families you have created)just let us know what we can do. We love you all and our thoughts are with you constantly. Your support group is impressive and we are so proud of all of you being there when needed. Please let us be there too! All our Love, Cary & Wendy

From Makayla

Jerry and Karen O’Neil are my grandparents. I for sure know speed was not an issue because I to used to always make fun of my grandpa for driving slowly, But he always answered "Stop being a back-seat driver!"

I know that every person in this world that knew him will miss his warm welcoming smile. Whenever we walked up to the front door in the mornings to visit you would either smell pancakes or he would be the first one outside to greet you and grandma right behind him.

In the past few weeks I got the chance to go to Arizona and visit grandma and grandpa along with my cousin Ashton. When we were in the air port getting ready to head home to our home around the Seattle area and as we were stepping on the plane the very last words he has ever said to me was "I love you!! Have a safe trip home!!!."

On Saturday we were at an event for some of our family and when we were done we called their cellphone. They didnt answer and we left a message. After this happening about 4 or 5 times of getting the answering machine from about 2:45 to 5:00 is when we started worry. Then my uncle who was with us at the time got a call and told us that grandma and grandpa were in a car accident and grandma was in the hospital and grandpa didnt make it.

May grandpa rest in peace!!!

From Rick and Deanna Kruckenberg

I worked as a Civilian Firefighter on A-Shift at McChord AFB from 1979-1985. As we worked opposite shifts much of the time, I got to know Chief O’Neil much better when he became the Fire Chief. The memory I have really doesn’t have anything to do with me but, rather my wife Deanna. She was an AF Medic working at the clinic on one of the worst nights I can remember. I had just dropped of dinner for the crew when they were notified of an Aircraft Accident off of the South end of the runway. Although the rain and cold was unbearable and the work unpleasant Jerry took her under his wing and gave her his Firefighter Jacket so she could bear the storm.

Thanks, Jerry you will always be remembered as a true gentleman.

Rick Kruckenberg
Chief of Training
Port of Seattle Fire Department

From Carol Hoefferle

My name is Carol Hoefferle and my husband (deceased) worked with Jerry at McChord. They were our first friends and have known them for 38 years. I am so sad about Jerry who was a wonderful man and wish Karen a speedy recovery and with her attitude it will be. I loved them both and if there is anything I can do for Karen when she gets out of the hospital please let me know.

Love

Carol

Another Update from Amie

Just wanted to update what an outstanding job I've observed of all the wonderful people who have been here for over a week helping grandma with her recovery. Also of all the support from everyone on the blog. The stories and comments/pictures are so great to see.

Suz and Mindy have switched on and off staying nights here at the hospital. They've also perfected the rolling and moving of grandma in her bed. Its great to see everyone here everyday to check up on grandma. Also, Hollis the 'ring leader' has held together this whole team. As for the blog, Lita has done an amazing job and I want to say thank you!

Grandma seems to be doing better and better everyday. She was up and conversing a lot with everyone today. I believe she got much better sleep last night. The nurse says the catheter will be removed tomorrow if grandma does some more moving around.

Going Home Soon

This update was received from Megan on 4/5/2008 @ 5:50PM:

The social worker was in this afternoon. They are going to try and release mom on Monday. It seems soon, but I guess we have to trust that they know what the heck they are doing. I asked a million questions and she answered them all. Mom is going to come home with me. She will need 24hr care, and PT. They say they will have a therapist come to the house until she is well enough for outpatient treatment. They may transport her home by ambulance, as sitting up for a long period is very uncomfortable. My Uncle Jim (her brother) and Aunt Beth got here around noon. They are staying with her this afternoon so she can get some rest. Mindy is going to go up and spend the night with her. The rest of us are going to start cleaning out my home office so it can become a recovery room. It's a good thing I have a lot of help, I haven't filed [papers] since the first of the year.
~Megan

Working on P #2

Another update from Amie:

Grandma didn't sleep well lastnight. She's been doing a lot of resting today after she finally found a comfortable position. The physical therapist came in and grandma sat up on her own, put her feet on the floor, but couldn't quite make it to stand. She can now roll over on her own and is going to try standing later in the day. She got to move out of her hospital gown into a soft cotton nighty and is eating more and more of her food each meal trying to work on 'P' number 2. She's up now at the moment (1:15pm) talking with us, hating the transportation process of the hospital getting her to and from places. Also not to mention the waiting. She had x-rays done last night at 10pm, but got in and out right away. We are still waiting on the results. Her 'blood clot' test came back good. Uncle Jim just arrived so I should have more information later.

From Andie Rymill

I've cried more in the past week than I can remember doing in the last year. And each cry is followed by warm chuckles when we get to recalling our friendship with Karen and Jerry. I don't know whether to credit them with our love of the motorhome life, or blame them for loan we took for that beast parked in the driveway! Our friendships started at EPD; both of us having met Karen at "Enumclaw Dispatch." Russ would pass many a boring shift visiting with Karen, and I worked alongside her. She & Jerry gave shelter to me and my displaced little family in a time of need and gave me a resounding "go for it" when Russ started courting me....a man can't have a better endorsement than theirs!! Enter Jerry and his motorhome mentorship. We parked our first rig in their driveway at Hayden Lake. They were the first ones to come look at our second one. And they were the first ones we told of our final (um, sure) purchase. Russ would seek Jerry's opinion on many aspects of the rv live. Once K&J retired we made sure to get together at least once a year for dinner and catch up. They are the most fun to visit with; we'd laugh till we cried. One animated visit brought about the rule of "no politics" while another brought the joy of a good cigar. Sharing recipes, updates on kids, notes of travels, old work stories, gripes of aging....a well rounded list of subjects to enjoy with the most wonderful people. It grieves us to know we'll not share Jerry's company again, and it's been worrisome to ponder Karen's injuries. These two people have woven a fabulous family. In the midst of the past week, they have offered encouragement, support, and even humor to the friends. That's SO Jerry. I guess we still have his company, don't we?
Andie Rymill

From Jennifer Madsen

Life won't be the same without Jer. He always had a smile on his face and kind words to say. Megan looks so much like her father, that chin and those eyes. She does however have Karen's personality and that excessive laundry disease!

We had the opportunity to spend last Easter with Karen and Jerry at their house in Puyallup where Jerry was in the middle of brewing his own beer. He loved good beer and the newspaper. He was always concerned about people and wanted to know how life was treating everyone. Karen is lucky to have a wonderful husband and a caring soul to spend her days with. Jerry was a wonderful grandfather and always tended to the grandkids every need. I can still picture him spending hours outside pushing Makayla on the swing or holding Garrett in his lap and reading him a story.

When Jeff and Megan moved into the house in Sumner a few months back, Jer helped all day with organizing and moving. I could see on his face how proud he was of everyone and the team effort it took. If only we had more people left on earth that were more like him. Karen, I am so sorry for your loss, we lost a tremendous man and someone I know you will always be proud of. I will truly miss him and I looked up to him as a wonderful husband, father and grandfather. Family will not be the same without him.

From Johnny Lowry

Jerry was a special friend to me I met him as a neighbor when I was 4 years old and he was 5 Jerry spent every birthday with me at supper for 14 years he used my birthday date to get into the army 3/18 Jerry was a man at 6 years he taught me how to smoke he also taught me how to make wine but noybody told not to cork the jug and it blew all over the bed. when it was finished he got sick and thru up out his bedroom window all night long. When I came home from Marine corps boot camp I thought I could lick the world but Jerry came to my defense and told the kid from Wilsall he would have fight him . Wow was I lucky. I took Jerry to the em. ward to get his lip sewed up. I called Jerry just a few weeks ago and had a nice visit .One thing I will always remember about Jerry was his smile. I will miss him

Johnny Lowry

Working on the 4th P (Physical Therapy)

Here is an update from the Karen's hospital room from her granddaughter Amie:

Suz, megs, and taren are also here. She got to eat clam chowder earlier today. They took her off the drip morphine and is on pill form pain medication. She was alittle upset when I get here, getting irritated with the doctors. They took her down for x-rays at about 3pm and gave her a test called artirial (sp?) 'a blood clot test' but she never made it to x-rays yet. They left her in the hallway again for almost an hour. She stood up today and the phycial therapist will be back tomorrow because she was in some pain after standing up. They will have her standing up again tomorrow. She's getting a lot more rest today it seems and her loud roomate leaves tomorrow! (hehe)
-amie.

From Amie

I have so many memories of my grandpa. He was who I spent most of my time with when I was younger. He was my bestfriend. When they lived at the big farm house in enumclaw id help him go out and take care of the baby calves. We'd go down the road where he'd show me how the big cows were milked from machines and bs with the old men. I was so upset when they sold the farm, even today I tell people if I ever win the lottery im buying it back.

Or how grandpa had made me multiple 'bug barns' for my bug facination over the years. He'd be outside with me for hours helping me catch them. Id follow him around everywhere he went. Helping him fix things or even just watching t.v. I don't think I have a single childhood memory that doesn't involve my grandma and grandpa oneil.

His favorite story he always told about him and I was the time he took me to taco bell. I was ahead of him in line and when it was our turn to order I had told the lady I wanted a 'soft taco', but while barely being able to see over the counter. She had laughed and looked and grandpa replying, 'is she with you'? Grandpa would giggle and smile through that story everytime, no matter how many times he told it.

I love him so much and miss him dearly. I know that someday I will see him again. He will welcome me with that big warm hug and the same smell he's had since the day I was born. <3

Grandma I can't wait for you to get better and to be able to be home. I know how much you wish you were. Im so glad and thankful that you are okay. Anything you need no matter the day or time im here for you. I love you grandma.

Love always, Amie

From Lita

Megan, Lita and Pat, circa ninteen seventy-ugly furniture and clothes!

I have known the O'Neil family since birth. Our families obviously spent a lot of time together because I remember calling him Uncle Jerry when I was a kid. And for some reason, I also faintly remember a lot of short-sleeved blue shirts?

Anyhow, Megan, my sister and I are all about the same age and I remember making the LONG trek to Enumclaw from Tacoma to go play. It was always an exciting time to be able to go visit (Are we there yet? Are we there yet?).

Here are some of the random little memories from my visits:

• I used to think Karen was the lady (Marni Nixon) on the local kids show "Boomerang" and was perplexed how she could be on TV one minute and then in their house the next.
• I remember Jerry rolling up newspaper into tight rolls, wrapping them in rubber bands and stacking them like logs to throw in the fireplace. I liked to hold the rubber bands for him and hand them to him when he was ready for one.
• I remember we little girls used to bug the crap out of little Jerry.
• I remember Jerry as this gigantic teddy bear that was really fun to hug.
• I remember Karen making mayonnaise in a jar which I thought was the most disgusting thing ever. Mixed up egg and oil just seemed so gross at the time.
• I thought Jerry’s ability to grow blueberries was the most amazing feat because I always thought they had to grow on farms, not in a backyard. He loved his blueberries and he loved to share them with us.
• I loved to crawl onto Jerry's big lap and get a pony ride...over and over again. And then Pat and Megan would pile on and he'd give us all rides at the same time. And we'd giggle.

From Gary and Dar

Dear Karen, extended family, and “our children”,

We were very sad to hear the news. Both Dar and I are grateful for the recent time we spent together at Brian’s graduation. We will visit soon as we head out a week from this Sunday, and yes
we will be careful. Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Together we all raised a bunch of good,strong children,grand children and great grand children that will get you through these difficult times.

Gary/Dar

From Alan and Family

Dear Karen and Family,

Our hearts and prayers are with you. We will continue
to pray for your healing during a difficult time. Jerry and Karen sound like
wonderful people. I remember you both from a family reunion but unforunatly
never got to know you very well. Karen's Aunt Wilma would like Karen and her
family to know she is praying for you. God Bless you.

Alan and Family

Karen's Fasttrack to Recovery

This is a short update: Karen is back in her hospital room this evening with the effects of the anaesthesia wearing off. Now that her pelvis is stabilized (see this post for details), she should experience far less pain. This surgery should expedite her recovery, starting with her first time of sitting up happening hopefully sometime tomorrow.

From Carleen

Some of my best memories of Karen and Jerry was when our families lived in Enumclaw. Megan and I were really young when we met and grew up together. We did everything with the O’Neil’s….they became our Washington family. I remember stuff like backyard BBQ’s, Thanksgiving dinners, birthday parties, breakfast at the farm, my dad and Jerry giving us kids the best firework shows on our street, camping trips and hiking in the Cascades. I’ll never forget the horrible smell of hops fumigating my parents house because Jerry, my dad and other local buddies were working on their latest brew. I even remember breakfast at McCord AFB once to see where Jerry worked and playing on the fire trucks. Oh and we can’t forget the night that I got driven home by the local police at the ripe age of 16. The cops knocked on my parents door and found their friends Karen and Jerry over for a visit. Needless to say the police stepped in the house to catch up with the O’Neil’s and to let me “sweat it out” in the police car. When my mom and dad left to go retrieve the car, Jerry just giggled and Karen kind of gave me a lecture on my stupid behavior. Anytime me and my parents were downtown we would always stop by the local police station to visit Karen where she was the dispatcher. But I would have to say the memory that sticks out the most in my mind (and that I often think about) is when I was learning to drive a stick shift. Karen and Jerry lived on a farm and had plenty of property that I could practice in…..and boy did I need it. First gear was a killer and I had the worst time just trying to get the truck going. I was stalling out, spitting up dirt and bouncing all over the pasture and all I can remember is Jerry and my dad at the fence cracking up calling me Mario Andretti. I had the nickname Mario for quite awhile after that. I think of that memory often, especially when I have to get behind the wheel of a stick shift.

Most of my memories were from my childhood and as I grew up our families moved around and weren’t together as much. By the time I was in my 20’s our families really didn’t have much contact anymore. Over the years I did keep in contact with Megan and would occasionally see Karen and Jerry at Makayla’s soccer games and such. I may not have a close relationship with them now but the whole O’Neil clan knows they will always be family to me.

Jerry, may you rest in peace! Your smile and laughter will be missed by so many! I was so blessed to have you as a second dad and miss you. Stand proud that you leave behind a strong and truly great family who has circled around Karen and each other with love and support. I love you and plan to see you again someday. We can catch up on old times and you can teach me to brew some beer.

Karen, continue to mend. There is no doubt in my mind you will recover completely. Your stubbornness, your “take charge” attitude and your wonderful loving family will see to it that you do. I just want you to know a little something too. You are the one and only person who still calls me Carleen. I don’t even let my own family use that name. I never asked you to stop because I knew I didn’t even have a choice. I knew no matter what, you would always call me Carleen, whether I liked it or not! For that I love you and that is what makes you so special to me! You never back down and always stand for what you want. Continue to do so and I will see you real soon.

Love always,
Carleen

From Stacy and family

Karen (Mom) and family- I am so sorry for your loss. I have so many memories from high school and after, that have your family in them. Pancakes for breakfast, going to the father/daughter banquet in high school, fire chief's breakfast at the base, Jerry (Dad) telling my mom to shut the G D (screen) DOOR when she came to pick me up . Karen was working grave yards. Fishing off the bridge at your place in Rathdrum...and many more! I felt like a part of the family from the first time we met!!! He will be VERY MUCH missed. My family and I are praying you recover fast and your heart also heals with time. Thank you for everything! We love you, are praying for you and will come visit when you are more on the mend!!! You can meet my little Jackson!

Take care- Love, Stacy and family (Henry, William, Elli and Jack)

From Teak & Casie

"Big Jerry" is my brother inlaw and, pretty much as everyone has stated he drove like an old lady. I played golf with Big Jerry when he and my sister came back to the east coast (to the farm in Erin N.Y) for visits. I will miss playing golf with him and hearing some of his stories on the history of this country and other things (I wish I had him as a history teacher, I may have learned somthing.) Last summer when they came home for a visit, my brother inlaw Tom Waite, his brother Jeff and I took Big Jerry to a Catatonk Golf coarse in Canton. There was one hole they had been rebuilt, that was a very long par 5. After we hit our second or third or possibly forth shot, there was this huge pond between us and the green. Big Jerry started bitching (in a fun way) about who the hell built this hole. There was no way to go around it, so you had to go over. I don’t remember how many balls we lost on that one hole but I did agree with Big Jerry. Who ever designed that hole must have thought Tiger Woods was coming to play, NOT. It was not a good hole for eiter of us, older golfers and women should get like a par 10 on that hole. We had a great time playing golf that day and he's probably telling Gus right now about how some idiot put a pond right in the middle of the fairway on that hole. He will be truely missed. But I am pretty sure that him and my dad (Gus) are playing 18 holes on the great golf course in the sky. I love you all and will be seeing you in the near future to help Karen with her recovery. Teak & Casie

We Love and Miss You, Jerry

Jerry spoke to Megan and Jerome the day before they left Arizona complaining about the heat which was received with no sympathy because it was snowing up in Washington. The morning of the accident, Karen sent a picture to all of her kids of Jerry in the snow. Megan could imagine him saying "I can't get my zipper up and it's damn cold out here!"

It's a Bagel!

Karen is out of surgery. She’s in recovery and sleepy, but she’ll be moving back into a hospital room soon.

About the surgery…

The doctor said of her pelvis, “It’s a bagel…and she got a ‘blue plate special’ surgery.”

Dr. Chip Routt was incredible in his explanation of how the surgery went and provided a lot of relief for the family. He apparently wrote the book on how to do this surgery and performs these on a regular basis.

The doctor explained the surgery using a bagel analogy (see the drawing on a pillow case at the left of the photo). Her pelvis was broken in three places and it has been repaired using more screws than a brand new deck. One of the screws, he explained, is about the size of a Sharpie pen and connects both sides of her pelvis. She also got two smaller screws to stabilize two other parts of her lower pelvis.

She also sustained a de-gloving injury where the skin and fat breaks apart from the muscle and then the space between fills with blood. He sucked that out and a handful of fat, which Karen should be happy to hear. We’ll have to be sure to exaggerate and say it was a bit more though.

He reports that she should be able to sit up this evening. If she’s up to it, she can get on crutches as soon as tomorrow. If she isn’t up to crutches, she’ll have to sit around for the next six weeks and as Dr. Routt said, “It’s like baking a cake. You just gotta sit around and watch it.”

He’s apparently into food analogies. It’s the language that we all speak and understand well.

Dr. Chip says that she will be in the hospital between 3 to 7 days, depending on when she can fulfill the 5 P's: Pee (self-explanatory), Poop (self-explanatory again), Pain (she can control her pain with medication or sheer will power), Physical therapy (pass the evaluation) and Place to go (with a family this size, self-explanatory). He said she can either go to a nursing care facility or if you're the Waltons, you can take her home. Well, Waltons, meet the O'Neils.

From Pam, Jaime and Summer

Hello this is uncle Jerry & aunt Karen's nephew Jaime and girlfriend Pam and our daughter Summer from Albany, NY.

We just wanted to share a few pictures we have of uncle Jerry from their visit to New York this past summer.

The picture with uncle Jerry standing by his van says so much in our memory. Summer's relentless requests to get in the van & eat all of his pistachios (which he peeled each and every shell off for her) never fazed him. He had an instant bond and a friend in Summer. As her parents, this was pretty amazing to see. He never bored of catering to her every request.
Now that's love.
He will forever be greatly missed.

We wish the very best for aunt Karen's (a.k.a. the" laundry fairy's") speedy recovery and WE LOVE YOU very much.

Love,
Pam, Jaime and Summer
Albany NY

Surgery Slated for Today - Updated

A specialist evaluated the information from an examination in the ER last night and concluded that there were not clean breaks in Karen's pelvis and that there were floating pieces present.

She is going to go into surgery sometime between now and noon-ish to have two plates installed in her pelvis.

The UPSIDE is that this surgery should speed up her recovery. The doctor reports that pretty close to immediately, she should be able to sit up rather than lay down for the next six weeks while she recovers.

UPDATE (1:55PM PST): Karen just went into surgery about a half an hour ago. Not only is she getting some of the best care in the area, her surgery today is being done by the doctor who pioneered the procedure -- he IS the best in the NATION. Depending on what the doctor finds during the surgery, it may take between 3 to 6 hours.

From Grant and Lil Mehling

The family and the world have lost a true friend, always known for his gentle personality and sense of humor. His concern for others shone through. My wife Lil and I got to know Jerry and Karen in Sundance Park in Yuma since they began wintering there.

This winter Lil was up a ladder picking oranges off a tree in front of our park model. Across the street sat Jerry and his friends having an afternoon beer. Jerry called across the street and told her that they would pick the top oranges "someday when they had nothing to do"! That was Jerry and he did find a day with nothing to do.

It is no surprise that Karen is making good progress----there is no other way that would be good enough for her. We wish for her the best recovery possible and that someday we will be able to share a few moments with her again.

But, Sundance won't be the same with out Jerry.

Grant and Lil Mehling
Nipawin, Saskatchwan
Canada

Share Your Thoughts

Karen hasn't been able to view this blog yet and before she does, I'd like to post any stories and pictures you may have about Jerry and Karen. I'm sure many of you have much to say and share, so let's get it on here for the family and others to read. It would mean so much to the family.

If you have a story and/or pictures you'd like to post here, please send them to lmonaghan@gmail.com and I will post them for you. Please be patient -- I will post them as quickly as I can.

- Lita

The Eagle Has Landed...at Harborview

Karen safely arrived at Harborview this afternoon --albeit the scenic route in dowtown Seattle. After a typical five hour wait, she was assigned a room in the East Hospital wing on the seventh floor. Word on the street was that the nurses in the Emergency Room were great and Karen was greeted by some of the top Orthopedic surgeons in the Northwest. Karen was quite relieved to be off the stretcher and back into a much more comfortable hospital bed.

A lot of family was at the hospital this evening -- they continue to be incredibly strong and so loving to one another. Jerry finally headed home for some much needed rest, Megan made it back to the hospital in some fresh underwear and Jeff and Susan got a fine meal from the cafeteria after foregoing food for most of the day. Rick, Amie and Ashton and the rest of us had a good laugh in the hallway reminiscing about the "interesting" folks hanging out in the Emergency waiting room (Megan gave everyone fair warning about how different Harborview would be compared to St. John's in sleepy Longview).

Back in the hospital room, the mood was light and humorous. Obviously, Karen is regaining her strength because as Susan put it, she spoke her first "cross" words when she told Megan to stop tapping her own leg (it was annoying to her)! She is still very tired but getting better everyday. Susan was going to be bedside with Karen tonight.

- Lita

This Blog Site

Sorry to confuse folks here. The original blog located at http://karenandjerryupdate.blogspot.com was "snooped" by a spammer yesterday in the comments section which I subsequently deleted. However, this raised some flags for the folks over at Blogger and they have put a temporary freeze on that blog for a possible anti-spam violation. I have requested that the freeze be lifted, but it can take up to two days for them to review the request.

In the meantime, I wanted to make sure folks could still get updates, so I transferred all of the posts to a new location: http://jerryandkarenupdate.blogspot.com. I have also changed the setting to require a verification code when submitting a comment to avoid spamming on this site.

I apologize for the inconvenience. Please let folks know of the new location.

-Lita

The Guest House

The outpouring of support to the O'Neil family has been immense during this difficult time. Beyond family and friends, the St. John Medical Center Foundation has been tremendously accommodating and has provided temporary housing for the family. Their "Guest House," which is operated by donations, is located near the hospital and has provided a base for the family to rest, eat and shower.

The family has requested that in lieu of flowers that you consider a donation to the Guest House to help other families who may need this critical service.







Donations can be sent to:

St. John Medical Center Foundation
P.O. Box 3002
Longview, WA 98632-9973

You can also make a donation online by clicking here. Please sure to specify "Guest House" in the "Donation Type" pull-down menu.

Karen on the Move

Here is the latest update from Karen's hospital room at St. John's as of 9:11AM:

• Karen is doing fantastic.
• She is on all clear liquids and can now eat stuff like pudding and jell-o (yum).
• She was sipping on some chamomile tea at the time of the update.
• In typical Karen fashion, she was organizing to get all of her flowers transported, so in other words, she is back to being her bossy self!
• She is going to be transported to Harborview within the next three hours.

She couldn't say much, but wanted to express on this blog, "I very much appreciate what everyone has done and I'll have more to say when I can talk more."

Flowers and Cards for Karen

The family would once again like to express their gratitude for everyone's overwhelming support, thoughts and prayers. There have been a lot of people asking where they can send flowers and cards for Karen.

At this time, the family is requesting that folks hold off sending flowers and cards because she is going to be transported to Harborview in the very near future. Her stay there will most likely be short -- a couple of days perhaps -- before she will be moved again, to a more permanent location.

When that location is known, we promise to update this blog to let everyone know where they can send flowers and cards. In the meantime, please feel free to leave a COMMENT on this blog. Your words of support and encouragement means so much to the family.

A Couple of Pics

The Email Heard Around the World

The following email went out yesterday and quickly made its way around the world, eventually landing in the inbox of Jerry's grandson, Justin, who is stationed in Iraq.

-----Original Message-----
From: Harris, John T Civ USAF AMC 62 CES/CEF
Sent: Monday, March 31, 2008 3:39 PM
To: Matlock, Kevin W CMSgt USAF AMC 62 CES/CEF
Subject: Chief Jerry O'Neil

It is with great sorrow the McChord Fire & Emergency Services Flight has to report the loss of one of our retired family members. Chief Jerome (Jerry) O'Neil was killed on Saturday March 29th 2008 as the result of an auto accident. Chief O'Neil served with great honor and distinction as Fire Chief here at McChord Air Force Base from 1984 thru 1989 and he will be missed by all of us that knew him. As we receive more information we will be sure to pass that information along. Please keep the O'Neil family in your thoughts and prayers.

Karen Out of I.C.U.

Yesterday on March 31, Karen was able to move out of the ICU at St. John's. She underwent surgery the day of the accident after she sustained multiple broken bones such as her pelvis, tailbone and ribs, as well as internal injuries. She spent a couple of days in the ICU surrounded by family and friends and has shown incredible strength on her road to recovery.

Keeping with Karen's typical sense of humor, one of her first requests was to have her teeth brushed. :)

Her family is working on getting her transported to Harborview in Seattle in the very near future.

3rd Party Information

Here are some links I've been able to find related to the accident:

http://www.tdn.com/articles/2008/03/30/area_news/10179828.txt

http://www.tdn.com/articles/2008/03/29/breaking_news/doc47eed1a796082941203558.txt

http://www.trentmueller.com/blog/fatal-car-crash-on-i-5-near-longview-washington.html

If you have any other articles or websites, please let us know.

In Loving Memory of Jerry O'Neil

May you rest in peace, Jerry.

This past Saturday, March 29, 2008, Jerry and Karen were traveling north on I-5 where inclement weather caused their vehicle to lose control. Their vehicle subsequently crossed the median and was hit by two other vehicles. Jerry was killed instantly and Karen sustained multiple injuries.